(continued from my previous post… How I Quit Smoking – Day Two)
I woke up in the morning feeling great as usual and I was very confident to last this day easily. All throughout the morning before going to the office, I noticed that the urge to smoke has gone weak. I could still smell the stench of old ash trays lying around that I haven’t disposed of and I really despise the smell of it. I felt good, imagine this is the third day I haven’t smoke for the last 22 years.
I arrived in the office, grabbed my pitcher of water filled it up, just trying to make sure everything is complete once the temptation strikes back and it did. It hammered me down completely that I almost gave in to smoke again. It all started when the phone rang and had an argument with the person on the next line and I felt the strongest urge ever to smoke in my whole life. I almost gulped down the whole pitcher of water, I was totally upset and the more it makes the urge to go stronger. I was about to stand up to approach my office mate and ask a cigarette, after all, I have done it in two days so I can easily quit again and I just need to choose a time where there is less stress.
My whole face was turning red, my jaws were locking up, and the words shouting in my mind “You need to smoke to calm yourself…” But before standing up to ask some cigarettes, I looked at the people around me who are not smoking, they are calm, they don’t need a smoke to calm them down, it’s this stupid nicotine that makes me feel this way. It’s a healing process for abusing myself for 22 years I told myself. So I sat back, gulped the remaining water, took a deep breath, read the notes, said a little prayer and the urge became manageable.
I hated that unforgettable experience but to be honest I am thankful it happened. The urge and temptation that followed were all manageable, but I never ever underestimated the temptation to smoke. If non-smokers are tempted to smoke what more of an ex-smoker, if proper conditioning of the mind has not yet been made, the chances of getting hooked again is very likely. Just remember, smoking taste bad, it stinks, it makes you a slave, it makes you lose your self-respect, your throwing money in the garbage, your introducing various disease in your body and smoking makes you stupid. How many times have we said to ourselves that smoking after a meal feels great?! The fact is it’s only psychological, it doesn’t make you feel great, it has no difference smoking before or after a meal, they are all the same. It’s your subconscious mind saying it feels good to smoke after a meal, so change that and you will easily control your urge to smoke after a meal and pity those that do it.
Don’t miss the last part of this series, read the last part of it – How I quit smoking – conclusion.
It is one year now since I Quit smoking and I don’t think I’ll ever smoke again. My life improved a lot, in new ways I never thought of in connection with quitting smoking. For instance, my life in hotel rooms got better. Before, I used to ask for a smoking room whenever I checked in a hotel. Smoking rooms have a bad smell, regardless the hotel category or cleanliness. Maybe they don’t smell if the hotel is new but this I cannot tell. Many times I had to endure that bad odor, being ashamed to go and ask for another room at the reception. I noticed that improvement from the first time I checked in a hotel as non-smoker and I was impressed of the nice flowery scent of the room.